1 ) Adolescents are particularly sensitive to criticism. - When things go wrong, don't attack your teenager. Dr. Haim Ginott said, "When a person is drowning it is not a good time to teach him how to swim," to which I'd add, "or criticize his performance." 2 ) Write personal notes to your teen. Focus on cooperation, rather than offering a negative critique. 3 ) Allow your teen to settle arguments by stating his case in writing, including recommendations for an appropriate solution. 4 ) Use "I" messages instead of "You" messages. Focus on how you feel as opposed to what your teen is doing. For example, try saying, "I feel upset when I'm nagged," instead of, "You are a pest." 5 ) Allow your teen the chance to save face and maintain self-esteem. 6 ) Give your teen choices. If he doesn't behave, then it was his choice not to comply and he must face the consequence that you'd discussed. 7 ) Review your own reactions to your teen. Don't keep doing what doesn't work. 8 ) When a teen is frustrated, he is not thinking clearly. Help him learn to think better by creating a map or script for handling things when he becomes upset. 9 ) Practice looking at things from your teen's perspective. Also, help your teen understand how his behavior affects other people. Try role-playing exercises in which each of you takes the perspective of the other. 10) Keep a log of the conflicts you have with your teen, and note the outcomes. 11) If you need to confront your teen, keep it short. Ask your teen if she can give you five minutes of her time. When the time is up, let the topic drop. 12) Take breaks when you or your teen is stressed out. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Sally_Chia